From A Single Mother on Father's Day
Originally published on June 18, 2023
From the heart of a Single Mother on Father’s Day. Should single mother’s expect to be honored Father’s Day? It’s a “No” for me.
Father’s Day is not Single Mother’s Day. It is a holiday to honor Fathers.
When my daughter was younger she used to celebrate Father’s Day by giving me gifts, of course it was things she made at school, but I accepted them. You see, my daughter’s father chose to be absent from her life. (Read more in the book Daddy, Do You Love Me?) When my daughter got older, I explained to her I could never be her father. I encouraged her to celebrate her grandfather and uncle. My Dad and brother never hesitated to step in and be father figures for my daughter since her birth. My daughter did not lack a supportive male presence in her life.
I took my role as a single mother seriously. I did the best I could with what I had and God did the rest through family and friends. As a single mother, I never said anything negative in the presence of my daughter about her dad. That should not be hard to believe. Not every single mother is bitter or petty. I know I can never raise my daughter as her father.
In honor of Father’s Day, I send blessings to all Father’s and father figures. To single mother’s who feel they fill both roles I send a reminder. You can only do what is in your capacity. If your child chooses to celebrate you on Father’s Day accept it. Thank them. This thankfulness is not selfish. Your child is just recognizing you as the active parent in their life. Consider your child’s age and encourage your child to celebrate the father figures who have stepped up. The males who show unconditional love and support and is consistent in your lives.
The last thing single mother's, don't use Father's Day, or any day as an opportunity to downgrade your child's absent father. If you cannot say anything nice about him, don’t say anything at all. Remember our day is Mother's Day. So celebrate Father's Day by helping your child honor who is present.
Happy Father’s Day
The perfect gift for daughters who dads choose to be absent from their lives. Perfect for Father’s Day or any day. -PN